merely Christmas

As expected I'm back to work.  There are only, I think, 10 of us reporting for work today; the rest are taking personal leaves and go on a vacation with families and friends.  And while I wanted so much to simply have fun and unwind and recover all my lost energy as I spent every single night in overtime, I couldn't.  Got to at least lessen the debts incurred. 

As expected, we spent Christmas inside my dad's lonely room, Rm 417.  All 6 of us plus my sis' hubby spent the night in the hospital.  We just had our usual dinner and then at 9pm, we were on our pillows and blankets, watching TV while dad was suffering the pain of his stomach.  I guess he took about 4 caps of pain reliever and still it didn't seem to work.  What a Christmas!

When the firework had started, Mama opened the curtain windows and we mused the colorful effects of each firecracker lighted, burned and released to give noise, beauty and pehaps bring joy to those watching it. My eyes saw how colorful the firework was, but my brain just refused to process the beauty that my eyes saw.  It insisted there wasn't any single color nor beauty at all.  And so I laid myself again and hugged my blanket and all of us were down again.

Was it really Christmas!  How come it wasn't Merry?

"Merry Christmas!" i greeted them all in a shout.

"No!  it's not Merry... it's merely Christmas!"  came my mama's reply.

Silence... deafening silence...

I wanted to believe this is all a nightmare.