family ties

Today, in our Japanese class we're discussing about Japanese and Filipino culture differences.  There, indeed, are many differences.   But I was struct at this difference- FAMILY.

The Philippines is known to have a strong family ties.  There are positive and negative effects of this, of course, but this is what we are and we love it that way.  The Japanese, being not so close to their families but to their friends is a known thing.

Our Japanese teacher doesn't contact her parents for quiet a long time.  I would like to guess, it been 10 years since.  This is a thing done by a usual Japanese child to her parents.  She said, not contacting would mean to their parents that they are okay and doing well.  And if she contacts them, it would mean, something's going wrong. 

I believe, this is weird.

Filipinos contact their families and loved ones wherever they go to keep them updated with the things they are doing and the places they're going.  Filipinos have to keep in touch with their loved ones to show that they care too and don't want their loved ones to worry about them, they are ok. 
Conflicting, isn't it?  The Japanese contact would mean a negative thing has happened whereas a Filipino contact would mean they care. 

We asked her, "What if your parents are sick?  Don't you wanna know?" 

"depends what type of sickness." came her reply.

"What if a matter life and death one, say cancer?".

"Leave it to them.  I can not do anything about it.  I can not cure them anyway.  That's life."

"Oh, in the Philippines, that's a hurting remark!  You should show to your parents how much you love them by seeing them and serving them especially when they dying.  You ought to show them how much you love them even in their last few days of existence. You should show them how grateful you are that they cared and raised you well."

"I am grateful to them in my heart.  That's enough."

We're all shocked.  Tears come rolling down our eyes.  I feel for the Japanese parents.  I think it's very sad to know that your kids don't care for you at all, the time they found a life of their own.  In reality, Japanese parents don't want to bother their kids too.   Yet, it's still so sad for me. 

It's just so sad for me.  (But I do understand them.)