merely Christmas

As expected I'm back to work.  There are only, I think, 10 of us reporting for work today; the rest are taking personal leaves and go on a vacation with families and friends.  And while I wanted so much to simply have fun and unwind and recover all my lost energy as I spent every single night in overtime, I couldn't.  Got to at least lessen the debts incurred. 

As expected, we spent Christmas inside my dad's lonely room, Rm 417.  All 6 of us plus my sis' hubby spent the night in the hospital.  We just had our usual dinner and then at 9pm, we were on our pillows and blankets, watching TV while dad was suffering the pain of his stomach.  I guess he took about 4 caps of pain reliever and still it didn't seem to work.  What a Christmas!

When the firework had started, Mama opened the curtain windows and we mused the colorful effects of each firecracker lighted, burned and released to give noise, beauty and pehaps bring joy to those watching it. My eyes saw how colorful the firework was, but my brain just refused to process the beauty that my eyes saw.  It insisted there wasn't any single color nor beauty at all.  And so I laid myself again and hugged my blanket and all of us were down again.

Was it really Christmas!  How come it wasn't Merry?

"Merry Christmas!" i greeted them all in a shout.

"No!  it's not Merry... it's merely Christmas!"  came my mama's reply.

Silence... deafening silence...

I wanted to believe this is all a nightmare.  

messed up

Yesterday was supposed to be my last day of work.  We're supposed to be on a Christmas vacation and get back on the 27th.  Damn.  My task got really messed up the minute I was about to leave the office last night.  I promised to eat dinner with my family inside my dad's room (in the hospital).  And so I left without fixing the thing I needed to fix and swore I would come back today. 

And yes, I am here.  I knew this could be fixed in less than an hour.  I arrived 9a.m. today and guess I am just so unlucky not to get this simple thing working.  No, it's not that I can't concentrate, it's just that the development board doesn't seem to cooperate.  And it's already 2:31pm.  And there isn't any single sign that this thing's gonna work perfectly as I wanted.  Goodness!

Just when I needed to rush to see my dad, my whole world just messes up!

How could that be?!?!?

Blue Christmas

It's December 23- very Christmas in the Philippines.  I'm afraid there won't be any Christmas at home.  My dad is in the hospital.  He's been there since the 21st.  Oh and I thought cancer is shift-deleted from his system.  How come I was so wrong?  It's striking again... and my dad's tummy is just bulging and it's real hard, as hard as a stone and he's getting real thinner. 

Mama has been crying.  I really can't help but feel sorry for whatever's gonna happen to our supposedly Merry Christmas.  Oh!  I wish it could still be merry and bright.  I hope this storm will pass us all again (like it did before) and we'll all be standing still.  And I mean, all of us.  And when I say, all of us, I mean, no one's missing. 

I couldn't imagine Christmas anymore the way I always have looked forward to that day.  And I can't believe it's getting nearer.  In less than two days it will be Christmas.  Would you care to lift my spirit up so I'd still hope the best is yet to come? 

7 Reasons Not To Mess With A Child

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human


because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a
human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah."
The teacher asked, " What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".


A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while
they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each
child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what
the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl
replied, "They will in a minute."


A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds


After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked,


"Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family)
answered, "Thou shall not kill."


One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes
at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several
strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"
Her mother replied,


"Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said,
"Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"


The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to
persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up
and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, he's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out,"And there's the teacher, she's dead. "


A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to
make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head,
the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the
face.." "Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary
position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted,
"Cause your feet ain't empty."


The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary
school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.
The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a
large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take
all you want - God is watching the apples."

an officemate emailed this to me. i kinda thought this is cute so, i'm sharin this.

love you ma

I just want to say I love my mama.

I'm sure she knows.

I just want the world to know.